Whether you’re dating, married, bacheloretting your life into a single girl’s heaven, there’s a relationship that - if you nurture it - will do wonders for the rest of your life. The relationship with yourself of course. Love yourself.Now, this concept isn’t a new one for many people who read this but if you’re anything like me, implementing it is a whole new ball game. There are many reasons why you may be hard on yourself today. Whether a terrible something-or-the-other happened to you in the past, living in the shadows of disappointment, insecurities… the list is long. But what are the reasons why you should be good to yourself? Do you cater to your own needs the way you would to, say, the love of your life? It feels good, you know. To take a second and commend yourself for something good you did. Or to invest the time you need to give yourself something nice. To be able to forgive yourself for something that you are not so proud of…In order to get to that level of self love, it takes steps. Small ones, but necessary nonetheless.

Make a Conscious Decision to Walk on the “I LOVE ME” Path

This one may seem obvious, as you are scouring this article for answers however it’s easy to overlook this single, very important step. Consciously deciding to be kinder to yourself is a powerful thing. Think about it. If you wanted to be somewhere warm and pretty, you wouldn’t just open your eyes and find yourself on the beaches of Jamaica (and if you can, indeed, teleport like that, PLEASE email me. I need to know you.) You would have to actually acknowledge your desire for a getaway and take the steps you need to make it happen. You’d let your job know, you’d find yourself some awesome tickets, you’d shop for your big floppy hat - you’d be focused on the task at hand because it’s something you decided to do. It’s the same thing with loving yourself. You aren’t going to be at a level of deep… Me Zen.. unless you decided to create the mindset for such a change. You would be deciding to make a conscious effort to treat yourself with the love and respect you wish/expect from others. I say all of this because I know how it is. You’ll hear a friend or loved one telling you about this but it’s in one lovely ear and out the other one if you don’t CHOOSE YOU. And so yes, taking a moment to think of the gains of such a change and deciding to GET those gains by doing what you have to do makes all the difference.

REPHRASE Those Things You Say To Yourself

“I’m a total screw up” —> ”I wasn’t prepared for that test. What was it I did wrong? I need to change my approach”“No one will ever like me because I’m (fill in the blank)” —> “You know, I’ve got great (fill in the blank). Hey, if you’ve got it…”This part isn’t the easiest thing in the world. It’s because we’re so good and so quick to pelt the negativity inwards that you might not catch yourself doing it. So one way to ease yourself into that way of thinking is every morning, or every night, you can get in front of a mirror and take a really good look at yourself. You do this so that you are your own focal point. You look at your reflection and you say to yourself at least one good thing about you. This alone is a very powerful exercise because you’re opening the doors to positive thinking. Soon enough, you can/will graduate to changing the tones of the statements you tell yourself. With some effort, the light that you cast upon your thoughts won’t always be meant to wound your self esteem.

Go Through the Motions

Even if it’s only once a week, doing something for yourself with the sole purpose of making yourself feel special is not only a mood booster, it’s an affirmation. What do you consider special treatment? A special meal? Bubble bath? Know that you deserve good things, regardless of your personal situation. Big or small, the point is to grant yourself a treat. So do something for you.

Personal Growth & Enrichment

I’ve learned that deciding to focus on my personal growth is a gift that keeps on giving. When you do something for someone you love, it’s because you want them to be happy or satisfied. It works the same way solo too. Get to know yourself and the deeper meaning behind your mindset and behavior. You’ll grow an organic content for self that will contribute to your strength and abilities.

Enjoy the benefits that come from Me Time and happy self loving!

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