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You’re basking in the sunny rays of self-kudos. You feel good because you had a great new idea. You decided to involve yourself in something completely new to you. So what if you’re a truck driver - you like to knit and gosh darn-it you’re doing to have the very best knitting class there is. That’s wonderful for you and you’re excitement propels you into the front lines of your new venture. And you keep feeling great until someone nearly blinds you with the Black Light. The Black Light would be the fine toothed combing of your every action, thought, and expressed notion highlighting your every error in all its brilliance. Get your umbrella out. All of a sudden someone decides to rain pour on your parade.
Hearing criticism is always a tough thing to deal with. Unless you are fortunate and are blessed with the useful gift of thick skin, critics can discourage you from pressing forward. That discouragement can ultimately unravel your plans and bench you and your potential indefinitely.
How about learning to utilize criticism to your advantage? And ultimately, if it really is useless to you, what can you do to release its iron grip on your will?

Constructive vs. Negative Criticism: There’s a Difference

It bites when you’re being told that you’re doing something wrong. But there is a difference between constructive criticism and negative criticism. Constructive criticism is meant to help you by pointing out weaknesses that you could afford to work on. It’s good for improvement and is helpful to you. Negative criticism is more destructive in nature. It comes like an attack and its sole purpose is to create conflict by being hurtful. Sometimes the person who does this is manipulative or is focused on getting attention. The ability to identify what’s constructive and what isn’t allows you to comb through the onslaught of commentary and harness it so that it serves a purpose useful to you rather than allowing it to hurt you.

Use Criticism as a Prompt to Review

Did someone point out something you didn’t want to hear but needed to? Let’s take it out of their ugly context for a minute (if they were a jerk about it, mentally flip them the bird and move on). Sometimes using someone else’s perspective on a situation helps you utilize your potential to a much fuller point. Think about it. Maybe they pointed out something you didn’t think about with the intention of discouraging you from forging on. Sometimes veterans of a field don’t always take kindly to newbies. It happens. However, perhaps they have the experience or a valid point that you need to consider. Take that and brainstorm your solution. Make it work. Using criticism to your advantage is a skill that can benefit you in the long run. Use it as a prompt to review your stance on that particular aspect. After all, if what you’re doing is something you really want to do, don’t you want to maximize your chances of success? That includes looking at it from all angles.

Don’t Try To Please Everyone

I’m sure you heard this before but I’m going to elaborate on it. You can’t please every single person who crosses your path. There will be those who think they can do better than you can, those who will pick a fight, people who are bored. Miserable. You have people who just won’t agree with you. If you were to alter your project with every comment or criticism made, the framework of your concept would inevitably disappear and you would have a shapeless pile of useless mush.

Hear No Evil. Speak No Evil

Baseless attacks, insults, negativity - it WILL get to you if you open the doors. Whenever possible, ignore those. Don’t waste your time and attack back - It’s a bottomless pit and will suck the life out of you and your optimism. Of course there’s a difference between standing up for yourself, and hurling mud at your opponent. Stick to your principles and make yourself clear. But if that includes shouting every explicative known to man back at a meanie, I suggest you pass.

The bottom line is you are bound to hear criticism at one point or another. It comes with the territory (of progress and success that is). The key is not allowing it and your hurt feelings to sway you reaching your goals. The only way you aren’t going to ruffle any feathers is by doing nothing at all. And really. Where’s the fun in that?

Photo by:  FredArmitage

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