13JunBig Dreams: 10 Critical Keys to Your Success - Part 1

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InMyHeels.com has been instrumental in my personal growth. With every post I write, every article I read, every book I devour with both myself and my readers in mind, my fire has been stoked without limits. This is why I’m ecstatic to write this piece. Every single key I share here is something I’ve utilized personally - some with this very blog - and have witnessed it’s powers in my personal life. And to think this is only the very beginning! It’s important to me that I share the best with you because it is MY big dream to help others be their best selves all the time.

I don’t fear dreaming big. Not in the very least. In fact, everytime I sense resistance with the HOW of what I’m dreaming about, I shake it off. I’d think “Not during the dreaming part”.

The way I see it - it’s MY imagination. I can think up whatever my heart desires. The other exciting part is realizing - each and every time - that if I REALLY wanted to, I can see most of these dreams come to pass. Taking a grasp of childlike freedom when giving yourself a moment to breathe and conjure up the mental images of your hearts desire is a liberating and thrilling exercise. Life tends to pelt us with the disappointments that disguise the faces of opportunities available to you every day. In attempting to play it ’safe’, many of us ditch even the ability to dream big. That is until one fact clicks inside you. No one is going to hand over your dream life and living as though you’ve been sentenced into the mundane is cruel and unusual punishment that creates stress, sadness, and dissatisfaction in our lives.

At least while reading this post, loosen up the chains a little and picture your passions. And hey, if you’re already a big dreamer, you’re in good company!

So holding your free pass into dreaming big, let’s now look at the HOW. What do we do about those?

Be ready to empower yourself with the great understanding that a) You have the right to dream big and b) You can live those dreams if you apply yourself. It’s all in the power of your intentions.

Do You Know What Your Dream REALLY Looks Like?

It’s possible that you have a vague idea as to what - for instance - the lifestyle you would like to live looks like. Something about airy fragrant surroundings or jet-setting all over the world in some sort of personal aircraft. That’s really nice. But you know what’s great? Taking in what your dream REALLY looks like. It’s more than some white-sandy beach. It’s Hawaii and you tour it online or, if you can, visit it yourself. You bask in the warm sunlight that kisses your cheek in the early morning and you can envision the scents, the people, and even the water right from your cubicle.

Why would you do such a thing?

Can you tell me something more inspiring that experiencing the very thing you want in the first place? Why on earth do you think luxury car salesmen hand over those keys and let you sink into the soft premium leather seats and speed off into the horizon? When you can SEE yourself in the position you want to be in, whether mentally or physically, you assume a role that you want to get back to. YOUR role. You belong in that driver’s seat and when you slink back off to the family hand-me-down car and see the stark difference, you remember with a smile what it was like and you make it your business to make it happen. That IS if you are being your exceptional self and have decided to find your way to your success. If not, you are most likely bitterly cursing your current situation. Something that won’t really have anyone knocking down your door to make it better. You want to seize your dream? Know what it looks like, tastes like, feels like, smells like. Envision it on a very regular basis. Walk through those pretty neighborhoods. Dress yourself as though you made it already. Practice those acceptance speeches. Get lost in those pretty postcards you save with the images of your dream destination. You are gearing yourself for what’s coming to you. And besides. It’s fun.

It’s All In the Strategy

Look. You’re in this to win and in order to do that, you’re going to have to strategize. Does that have to be hard? ABSOLUTELY NOT! In fact, one of my favorite facts would be this - there are myriads of people out there who not only did what you want to do, many of them wrote about it. They put together a DVD or a CD. Compilations even. You want to be like the winners? Just simply look at what the winners did! Even if your situation is drastically different and you cannot emulate the play-by-plays, the exciting thing is you can learn from their mistakes. You can devise your own plan. If you really want to make it happen for yourself, why lament over the fact that you didn’t get the same starting place as the next gal? Get there by starting small — which brings me to my next tip.

Bite Sized Pieces

One scary, overwhelming thing about big goals would be the size. So you want to start a business that shoots up in unbelievable success. Since you’re about strategy, you’re going to start from the top and think smart. Right now, you’ve got $23 in your bank account. Fine. But you’ve also got free resources online, at your local library, in your town - etc. You can get the school loan if you really want to. You can read up on starting a business and see where you can begin. There are so many steps that need to be done anyway and so the genius that is you decides to mind map and see where you go from there.

What’s mind mapping?

It’s a brilliant little brainstorming exercise that I have way too much fun with every time I do it. Simply put, you put your big goal in the center of a sheet of paper and circle it. Now you’re going to add singular branches to it. What do you think of when you think of your big goal? What are the important elements that make up that dream? Each element gets it own branch. And each element is also broken down into its own little branches. What do you have to do to make each element happen?

Here is a link to help you visualize and understand a bit more about mind mapping. Also, for those who like tinkering with software here are two free online programs designed specifically for mind mapping! They are Mindmeister and Mindomo although paper and pencil would work just fine.

You do this until you have a bunch of bite sized pieces of tasks. Even if it’s something as small as Buy Notepads, you know that every one of these actions contribute to the BIG PICTURE.

Now here’s something important to note. All those tasks - whether small or large - become real when they make it into your date book with a time frame to complete. You’re not only about dreaming big, you are about making those dreams come true. These are all just great ideas until you start implementing them into your life.

You Get a Round Of Applause For Every Good Thing You Do

Sounds gratuitous? Eh, so what. You’re not asking others to applaud you for buying that notepad but you are mentally noting that fact. Here’s why. With the continuing acknowledgement of your progress comes momentum. You have got to love momentum. It fuels you to do more. It increases your confidence and the sense of self that you need to enjoy life. It’s easy to constantly be down on yourself not realizing that you reprimand yourself for all of the little things. So how about your commend yourself for the good ones?

While you’re at it - write it down.

Before I continue - I must note that many people know that writing is really helpful and yet they don’t do it. Perhaps it seems tedious. But I must point something out. The habit most people have in speaking to themselves usually veer towards the negative side. Furthermore, you may THINK you remember every bit of progress you made but the reality is alot of people could stand to take a real look at what’s been going on so they don’t feel defeated by what seems like standing still.

So that being said, write down moments of progress and successes - large or small - in a dedicated journal. You will be able to have proof in your hands that you can look over on a regular basis of you moving forward. This is AMAZING for your self esteem. After all, many big dreams take a lot of time and it’s easy to lose that steam before you get there because you feel like you’re going no where.

Well. That’s for the person who doesn’t write it all down.

YOU on the other hand can see exactly whats going on. You can see how you’ve handled possible disasters as opportunities to grow. You see where you’re going. Now there- doesn’t that look good?

Be Ready for the Limelight

I can’t imagine anything more horrible than allowing a great opportunity (ditto if it was once in a life-time) steam roll right past you because you were not ready for your chance to shine.

There are several ways to tackle such moments. Make them yours by

- Using every day as another opportunity to do your best. Everyone starts somewhere so if you have to, begin with the incredibly important fundamentals. With a consistent dedication, your skills will develop. This means you are working at it DAILY. Your mind is geared towards your progress. You jump at chances to flex those growing muscles and you see no reason to miss out on thing that scream Chopped Liver (entry level or volunteer) because strategically thinking, you are in the richest position yet. You are honing your skills so that when the time comes, you blow them out of the water. That can’t happen with merely dreaming all day.

- Not allowing fear to cripple you. Being terrified of proceeding because you MIGHT mess up is a terrible thing that gets to many us Take that fear and use it to your advantage. Use it to get ready if you can. Use it to help you pay attention to detail. Know that even if you messed up, you’re alive and well with a new bit of experience added as a notch on your belt for next time.

- Be well versed in whatever industry it is that you’re interested in. Know who the notable folks are and take it up a notch by learning some of the others as well. Study their progress. See where they come from. Find one who ‘looks like you’ (meaning came from a similar situation, background, etc.) When someone in your field comes to speak to you, you won’t have a blank stare when The Expert is mentioned. And ok, if you’re new or you just don’t know yet, make note and go home to learn. Take solace in the fact that you are silently climbing up with every bit of knowledge you expand your mind with.

The second part of this series will be coming soon. If you haven’t already, I encourage you to subscribe because you won’t want to miss it!

Photo by: Bram & Vera


  1. 1 Vered13 Jun 2008

    I LOVE this:

    “Being terrified of proceeding because you MIGHT mess up is a terrible thing that gets to many us Take that fear and use it to your advantage. Use it to get ready if you can. Use it to help you pay attention to detail. Know that even if you messed up, you’re alive and well with a new bit of experience added as a notch on your belt for next time.”

    I couldn’t agree more. Allowing fear of failure to hold us back is a HUGE mistake.

    Thank you so much for this article, JEMi.

    Vereds last blog post..Could MomGrind Use A Little Profanity?

  2. 2 Anonymous13 Jun 2008

    i really liked your article! you are a great motivator!!! please keep on writing so that we can keep on reading!

  3. 3 Sara13 Jun 2008

    This article was the first thing in my reader but I’ve been saving it for last. Worth the wait! Your energy comes through loudly and clearly here. I like the idea of experiencing our dreams both as a way to make them tangible and also as a test run. I can imagine realizing that, “Hey, Hawaii is nice and all, but I’m sick of the rain.”

    You’ve got me ready to take physical action on keeping track of progress. Good things are happening each day, but it’s easy to get discourage when progress isn’t lightning-fast. Darn short attention spans…

    Thanks for taking the time to write a heartfelt series; it’s really showing through.

    Saras last blog post..Fall in Love with Life

  4. 4 Natural14 Jun 2008

    I totally agree with the writing things down JEMi. It really does help you see how much progress you have made in the past and propels you forward to bigger things. Wonderful and Encouraging post, as always.

    Naturals last blog post..The Rise of the Freemale

  5. 5 Laurie14 Jun 2008

    I think the biggest challenge is truly believeing that you can accomplish your dreams if you work at it. I think many people stop at the dream because they think it can never happen. I’m through with thinking my dreams can never happen. I am making them happen. Thanks for the insight. I will take it to heart.

    Don’t be your own worst enemy! Be your own biggest cheerleader!!!

  6. 6 Anonymous14 Jun 2008

    Hi Jemi: I also use mindmapping, it helps me to see the whole picture in a way that writing something in list-form simply does not. And I completely agree that it’s very important to be well-versed in your industry. You have to take time to perfect your craft. That photograph is beautiful!

  7. 7 Barbara Swafford15 Jun 2008

    Smiling JEMi, you are so wise for your years. :)
    This post reminded me of one of my favorite quotes for goals is “A journey of a thousand miles, begins with a single step” - Confucius

    I do agree, writing down our thoughts, progress, etc, is essential to the process of growth and goals. It’s a great means of measurement.

    Barbara Swaffords last blog post..Adding A Favicon Just Got Easier

  8. 8 JEMi15 Jun 2008

    Thanks everyone for your lovely, insightful comments!

    The writing things down is a favorite tip of mine as I have seen how it has truly affected my life in a positive, encouraging way. I can’t wait to share part two with you guys!

  9. 9 Robert A. Henru15 Jun 2008

    Great post Jemi, can’t wait for the second part.
    The one that touched me the most is the part on the importance of acknowledgement. It’s so true. Look at the little success, little step we have done everyday, and make it BIG ! =)
    Robert

    Robert A. Henrus last blog post..What I learn from Kung Fu Panda

  10. 10 Mer16 Jun 2008

    Great post, I love to write what I want down, it really helps to discover what you really want

    xxx

    Mers last blog post..Valentino: temas y variaciones

  11. 11 Cynthia16 Jun 2008

    I think I need to sit down and really figure out what I want to do.

    I believe I let my fear (in a way) as well as my willingness to help others (thus, throwing my own dreams onto the back burner) cripple me. I need to learn to feel enpowered in spite of the fear and keep myself moving forward.

    Thank You for this article. My mind lately is all over the place, hopefully this will begin to focus it.

  12. 12 Christina16 Jun 2008

    Wow! I love how you’ve summed up what it takes to be successful! I agree with take little pieces at a time, sometimes our goals may seem to big to achieve. But when we take bit by bit it makes the challenge more bearable! Thanks for inspiring me!

    Christinas last blog post..Overcoming Difficulties - Quote from Robert Frost

  13. 13 Shilpan | successsoul.com17 Jun 2008

    JEMi -

    Wow! It resonates so much with my life journey that I’m speechless. It goes back 17 years when I came to this great nation with mere $20 bucks and dream to make my own destiny. I felt as if you knew my life as I’ve been to many of these tests and I’m glad I did. Life is really good if you love to face the follies and embrace them as much as you embrace your success. Needless to say, I’ve stumbled. Great work.

    Shilpan

    Shilpan | successsoul.coms last blog post..How to Cultivate Mental Clarity and Happiness

  14. 14 MizFit23 Jun 2008

    amen to all of this.

    so many clients with whom I worked WANTED *something* but had no idea yet what the dream was….and were still angrybummeddepressed it hadnt materialized yet.

    Miz.

    MizFits last blog post..Monday Facetime (why yes, my hair IS still wet from the shower. that’s the way I roll.)

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